so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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