it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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