I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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