Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
