She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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