the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
try to milk me bitch
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