I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
