I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
