JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
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