so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
