You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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