Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize