If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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