what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
