It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
