shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize