Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I could fuck to npr.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
