I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Randomize
