I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
im holly from the hills drunk
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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