in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
