At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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