You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
