so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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