Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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