Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
