Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
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I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
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the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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