He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize