Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
