You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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