halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I need to sanitize my soul.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week