So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Randomize
