Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
She swung at the pinata with crutches
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
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