whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
