Got a toothbrush?
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize