Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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