Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Randomize