i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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