we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize