I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
