Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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