go do what you do best...puke behind churches
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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