I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize