Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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