ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I can feel your judgement through the phone
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
