Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
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I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
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Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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