I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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