They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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