This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
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You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
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She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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