i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You ruined the universe
Randomize
