I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.